The New Monogamy: Dr. Tammy Nelson, author of Getting the Sex You Want

In this episode...

Dr. Tammy Nelson is a sex and relationship expert, and author of many books on sex including Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together. She’s a psychotherapist, Director of the Integrative Sex Therapy Institute, university teacher, TEDx speaker and is the host of the podcast The Trouble with Sex. Tammy is also a Board Certified Sexologist, an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Certified Imago Relationship therapist, and a Licensed Alcohol and Drug Abuse Counselor.

Today on The Soul of Life I speak with Dr. Nelson about what it takes to have a vibrant sex life with a monogamous partner and how cheating during COVID has taken on new proportions.

We talk about the mindset that’s required to prevent or recover from infidelity and why it can be an opportunity. We discuss several myths about infidelity, sex, and eroticism:

-“Women actually do cheat for sex. Men tend to cheat for emotional reasons.”

– Do all affairs happen because of sexual problems?

– Does communication and empathy have the power to fix sexual frustration?

– Why does emotional closeness sometimes seem to kill erotic passion? 

"When you’re having an affair, it’s not that you’re looking for someone else. You’re looking to be someone else. So if we look at ‘who did you become in that affair,’ instead of ‘why did you cheat on the person that you’re with,’ then we have a totally different narrative that both people can understand and look at a little bit differently."

- Dr. Tammy Nelson

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